“A ship in harbor is safe, but that’s not why ships are built.”
I’m going to be working at a bible camp this summer and it’s bringing up a lot of mixed emotions. As someone who plans on majoring in children’s ministry, working with kids in a Christian environment for an entire month is great experience. I should also be excited to work alongside people my age who have a heart for God’s kingdom.
But the truth is that I’m not excited. I’m scared. I don’t want to have to leave Waupun again just to find myself in an unfamiliar place with people I’ve never met. I’m afraid of wasting my time, of not making friendships, of failing to have any impact on the kids.
I named my blog Hurricane and Harbor because I’ve always been able to see and feel the contrast of safety vs. danger, good vs. evil. But I’m starting to realize that being safe in the harbor isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. God has poured a lot of time and effort into making me the person that I am today. He has carefully crafted this vessel with His own hands. I was made to venture out, to discover new things, to be tested in the waters. What a waste not to leave the shore!
Not only is it a waste, it’s selfish on my part. I have been prepared for this moment in my life, through youth group, mentorship, and college. It has always been God’s intention for me to serve at this camp. Instead, I’ve tried choosing to ignore it all and stay home. I’ve decided that my fear is a good enough reason to ignore God’s will. What a selfish beast of a thing inside of me to say that my comfort is more important than the plans of the Lord!
So this summer I’ll leave the harbor. Right now the water looks rough, but I’m hopeful that it will be rewarding. I’ll try to keep you updated on the adventure and all the work that God is sure to continue performing on this less-than-perfect ship. Anchors away.
1 comment:
I know I don't know you very well, but when I read your last couple of posts, especially this one, my heart went out to you and I wanted to try and encourage you.
Leaving the harbor can be terrifying...I know because I seem to be frightened by it every year or two, just when I'm sure I've got it all down. But it also means adventure and exhilaration: how will you ever really feel the wind in your hair or the water under your feet till you set sail? And storms come, of course. Wicked storms, sometimes, that bring pain. But "even the wind and the seas obey Him!" He won't let you go. Remember Aslan? "Safe?! Nobody said anything about safe. He's not a tame lion. But he's good."
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